Life As Preparation

When the signs of age begin to mark my body (and still more when they touch my mind) When the ill that is to diminish me or carry me off strikes from without or is born within me;

When the painful moment comes in which I suddenly awaken to the fact that I am ill or growing old; And above all at the last moment, when I feel I am losing hold of myself And am absolutely passive in the hands of the great unknown forces that have formed me;

In those dark moments, O God, grant that I may understand that it is You

(provided that my faith is enough) who is painfully parting the fibers of my being in order to penetrate to the very marrow of my substance and bear me away within Yourself.

Fr. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin                                                                                                       Cited in Prayers for Healing

DeChardin has always been a favorite of mine, and you will find his quotes throughout this year of reflection… He has been a knowing and sensitive guide for me particularly around how faith and Tillich’s “ultimate concern” come together graciously… They blend, infuse and penetrate the questions and intimate/ultimate concerns of life and death and how life, existence, science, mystery, and God blend into greater meaning…

Here is where I find his welcoming of age, illness, and death with a heartfelt humility, and a noble yearning that acknowledges that we have an earthly body and a heavenly soul; and that when it comes time for my passing, I will return to the elements from which I was originally made…

That recognition of the ultimate separation will be welcomed with the acknowledgement that my life has prepared me by way of age, illness, and hard won wisdom, so that has rendered me open; open to the sense of grief that melds with gratitude. That the sense of self once again, can merge with the unknown, that I become one with the mystery that is God, and that I return to the fathomless and gracious place, that place of unity, we can call God…