I am because we are, and because we are, I am.

African Proverb

Cited in The Mystical Hours

An excerpt from my Winter Volume of Seasons of The Soul…

Br. Teasdale gives a longer description of this concept of belonging, which I will excerpt before making my comments

     “We exist in community, and in relationship with one another. Our individual being depends on others, and we are defined by relationship. Former Archbishop Desmond Tutu tells us that this concept in South African culture is called Ubuntu, meaning, ‘A person becomes human through other persons.’ He calls this the opposite of our Western notion of ‘I think therefore I am.’

     We become aware of ourselves through others. Identity cannot be achieved in isolation from the community, but in the give and take of communication, in sharing life, and through shared culture. Let us carefully consider the balance necessary in our lives between the individual and the community and cherish our fundamental dependence on others.”

     The desire to be an individual or to be “one’s own person” and the desire to have or hold to comforting affirmation of belonging to a family, clan, or tribe accentuates the tension that is commonly found in the process of social and personal maturation in our Western society today. 

Rather than feel that one must choose which side of the relational equation is the right one for each one of us, it is far better to see what Bishop Tutu advises: That there is a dynamic and necessary interplay of both the individual and the society, and that they are of mutual importance and are ultimately significant in defining our adult personalities. 

     What I would call the concept or the principle of interdependency.

     Neither the dependency of a child nor the aloof self-directed definitions of adulthood can confidently and sufficiently sustain us. Chooses one way over another cannot offer us a complete sense of meaning, purpose or identity. Those hard won, lifelong insights and comprehensions that shape our sense of individuality come from daily living within the cauldron of instructive interactions with family, society, and culture.